"Mental health is everywhere". We all have mental health, but do we all know how to care for it? ". And as a leader do we know has to take care of our employees' well-being?
Maybe you directly caught it, ''Toss your dirty shoes in my washing machine heart'', This part of the lyrics of Machine washing heart by Mitski resonated in me when I am thinking about Mental health and my role as a leader.
Mental health issues in the workplace have become a talking point recently specifically in May as the Mental Health dedicated Month. Good mental health is important for everyone, whether you work in a large company or on your own. What is good mental health? It's important to understand that it's not just about feeling happy all the time. Good mental health is about feeling able to manage our emotions, as well as being able to deal with life's challenges and reach our personal goals.
Did you know that Leaders are the primary source of mental health in an organization !
Let's take a look at how we can help our staff/colleagues to develop a healthy working environment, and how employees can also take personal responsibility for their mental health. In summary how to take care.
How to care?
When you think of a caring leader, what comes to your mind? One who gives everyone a big hug? One who has the most fun in meetings?
Caring leadership is more than just being nice.
It’s about caring for people in ways that create real value for them, being able to take their negative moments, putting in the machine washing heart and making it cleaner.
Mental health is at risk when emotions are out of control and the pressure to high to be endured.
The world is constantly changing, but our human condition remains the same. So when we experience these life's negative moments, those stressful moments at the workplace, these collaborations that do not go in the right direction. When those tough moments happen, we need to care about our people and find a way to help them to go through them.
For this I have 3 recommendations:
Practice what you preach so as a caring leader you are not excluded from using these records ;)
1. Venting under control
There are many ways to deal with emotions, and venting is often the first reflex, and you probably did it in the last 24 hours!
To vent means to express your anger, frustration, or resentment in an uncontrolled way. When people vent their feelings, it helps them to feel better, but it doesn't solve the problem at hand.
Venting is not ...
Venting is not gossiping, is not complaining, blocking, criticizing or pointing a finger, this is when it could be instead of relief being harmful.
Venting is ...
Venting the expression or release of strong emotions, how you felt, why you react and when under control it could be very helpful .
So here I will not cover how to help them control better their emotions, this will be partially covered by point number 2!
Letting it out is crucial, and they are a lot of situations where a caring leader could make a difference. As it is considered the 1st reflex and could generate more negative results, let's try to care with training, coaching and advising our people on how to vent under control.
BE SAFE, as expressing our emotions could deviate in all ways, protect ourselves.
Psychologists defined a safe environment as a place where individuals can feel free to share their feelings openly without judgment and with confidentiality.
Obviously, you are already identifying all the collateral impacts that venting not within a safe environment could create. The most important thing is it will not only just aggravate the situation, but more impact the mental state of your people. So if your people need to vent secure the environment where confidentiality will be kept and you will not be disturbed. Yes, we will not be generally the ones chosen by our team members to vent but equipping them with this rule is key.
The person could be a family member but more commonly we will choose a person who knows the environment where the bad feeling were created. So within the family, if the problem occurs with your relatives or at the workplace in case of something happens at work.
So let's vent UNDER CONTROL.
WITH THE RIGHT PERSON, You or the chosen person need to be a listener not a supporter to avoid turning this venting moment into a negative activity.
A person that would generate empathy and active listening. So with your family goes to the wise one and for the workplace, choose someone with maturity or your manager for him or her to express caring leadership.
As a leader listener, you need to practice empathy and not sympathy. And don't forget active listening with your mind and body language aligned. Don't try to participate, listen, try to identify the different emotions and let the person vent, vent and vent. You could take notes for your next meeting, to be able to ask open question to make your employee step back and make them able to be open to solutions.
Not everyone could be The trustworthy person . Maybe as a leader, you are not fully confident that you could assume this role, as everything in leadership it's always a work in progress, so take the time to practice, be coached and ask for help. Also, don't hesitate to use and guide your employees through all the support systems in place within your organization.
AT THE SAFEST PLACE, walls have ears!
To make it easy , a place that guarantees you the confidentiality of this sensitive moment ! Venting cannot be done publicly. Take the time to choose the right place a secure place. So lunchtime at the canteen not a good idea, all the place where the sound waves could be sent through the air andreach the outside world. It is not good to vent out anywhere.
2. Solution-minded for a positive outcome.
As a leader you are certainly exposed to many of these situations when collaborations are in a bad shape, where expectations are not met, interpersonal conflict and creating stressful and negative states of mind.
People who excel manage their emotions are often the Solutions minded people, they tend to be able to solve their problems without getting emotional about them.
The role of the caring leader is to bring their people to the solution and more to adopt the mechanic to go to the solution.
Fighting natural reaction
Emotions can be a great motivator, but they can also lead to poor decision-making and conflict in the workplace.
We tend to say: ''that is professional not personal'' . Hahaha easy to say when we consider the idea of the "fight or flight and more and more freeze" response, where when faced with a stressful situation, your body prepares you for combat. It's a survival tactic we've inherited from our earliest ancestors. But the workplace is not a prehistoric jungle. It's more like a modern jungle gym.
Train our people how to react to problems and adopt the reflex to go on the solution instead of focusing on the problem . The best way to open the door of solutions are open questions and more leading questions to train them to replicate the same next time and let them come up with ideas and be the one that finds the solution . Questions like :
What we will do about it?
2. What can we do differently? What could be the mitigation plan?
3. What can we learn from this?
4. What can we control?
5. Who can you ask for help?
6. How can you be solution-minded?
Conflicts don't generally means opposites goals
"Conflicts and opposition don’t necessarily mean opposites’ goals". Often its the interest of each counterpart that differs.
This is known to anyone who has ever had to say a firm “no”. Before you go any further, make sure that both parties understand the meaning of the word “no”. There are times when it is important to say “no”, instead of something else. When we are faced with opposition, we will have to choose between these two options: compromise or conflict. When you have a conflict, it means opposing points of view and interests. It should be resolved, but this requires an understanding of the positions of each of the opposing sides. The goal is to find a solution that will satisfy both parties to the conflict. This can be achieved by avoiding confrontation in favor of negotiation.
It’s also possible to make a compromise without conflict.
This is not always easy, but it is possible. In most cases, oppositions are due to a misunderstanding. If a person who has an opposing point of view asks you why you did something or how you feel about something, then you can explain your actions and feelings, and show the other person that your actions and feelings are not opposite at all. It’s also important to know who you are talking to, so that you can choose the right words to describe your actions and feelings.
Transparent mediation or deep diving on the other side will be a good way to find the right solution. Express what is creating the negative situation is also a part of the process and so many root causes could be the trigger: unconscious bias, level of knowledge, strong personality, level of humility, different facts and also different preferences.
As a caring leader, you must diffuse these situations reconciling interest around solutions and handling conflicts failyr and efficiently manner for the parties involved .
Life and Worklife will be boring without conflict!
We are aligned , It’s an inevitable topic, conflicts are a natural part of our lives in the workplace and the way we deal with conflict defines the relationship we want to have with the people we work with. Conflicts is an unavoidable part of our jobs and they bring a lot of benefits . YES!!! Solution-oriented means also Positive thinking! Conflicts help us to grow, evolve and become better. They increase self-awareness, improving communication skills and transparency. So even the way to look at conflicts needs to change.
The notion of conflict being a positive force has been put forward by several authors, who argue that conflict should be seen as an essential catalyst forchange and that it can even be a source of innovation.
The Leader role is to prevent or reduce conflict, but it’s also important that managers are aware they can turn conflict into a positive force. The task is not only to resolve the conflicts but also to find the positive side of them. This is because once you have exchanged ideas with someone else, you have learned something about yourself and your environment. So even if you lose the argument you will gain knowledge.
3. Sport is not the only way to protect our mental health.
When we speak about wellbeing and health at the workplace so many times we are advised to have a sportive activity : walking, running, swimming, to which we get this image of sweating sweating and sweating. And definitely, It will work for the people that have time, energy and condition to do it as its one of the best way to release endorphins, the chemicals in your brain that relieve pain and stress.
A new form of creative outlet is here and it's all about putting a positive spin on everything!
How about creative outlets to help us to go through the tough times or how to give our imagination a workout !!!
In recent years, art therapy has become a powerful tool for many people who struggle with mental illness, addiction, and even terminal disease.
One of the best ways to relax and let your mind wander is to let your imagination express its full potential and it could have infinite dimensions as you are unique and your imagination too. For example, I let out my stress by singing out loud a song that is chosen in purpose while imagining redo the stressful situation but with me using the meaning of the lyrics to vent. I am interposing the situation with singing out loud and I can tell it works pretty well, I am also moving and even sometimes dancing at the same time (here's my sport activity lol ). Whether you're a writer, painter, sculptor, dancer, or musician, there are infinite ways to express yourself creatively. Do you only write blog posts? Or do you paint as well? Maybe you take photos or create short films… Regardless of what types of creative outlets you choose, it's all about expressing yourself in a way that makes you feel good.
Creative outlets can improve our health and relationships.
It has been scientifically proven that creative people are more likely to be happier, healthier, and more well-adjusted. But it's not just creative individuals who benefit from creativity: when we are creative, it helps us in our relationships with others as well.
The thing is how we accompany our people to find their creative outlet, same as usual asking questions, observing when they are thrilled doing something. Having a method to let it go is as essential as developing competencies and knowledge. You could also organize creative sessions with your team to boost their creativity.
To conclude :
My big brother said to me one time when I was experiencing a bad event and crying for weeks: <<Be prepare little sister , life will bring tough times and as your acceptance will be higher each times, it will always appear higher, stronger, not generally at the right time and it will challenge you again and again.>>
He was right and described with his own words the human condition facing emotions.
Remember mental health problems are common and could happen to everyone. As we are the primary source of mental health in an organization . Ok wait ... let's reformulate as caring leaders we are the primary source of good mental health in our organization . So lets care by creating safe environments, opening the way to solutions instead of problems and finding creative outlets.
Thank you for your reading .
Don't hesitate to share your feedback, thoughts and comment.
Sandra A.
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